Listening to Your Inner Voice: Why Self-Compassion Matters More Than Self-Criticism
We all have an inner voice. Sometimes it’s kind and encouraging, cheering us on when things feel hard. But often, it can be critical — pointing out what we “should” have done differently, highlighting mistakes, or comparing us to others. Over time, this inner critic can shape how we see ourselves, fuelling anxiety, self-doubt, and exhaustion.
At Coastal Counselling Walk and Talk Therapy in the Northern Rivers, I often hear people share the weight of their self-talk — and the relief that comes when they learn to shift it. The truth is, self-compassion isn’t weakness. It’s strength. It’s the steady, gentle reminder that we are human, we are learning, and we are enough as we are.
Why Self-Criticism Shows Up
Self-criticism often arises from years of messages — from family, school, work, or society — telling us we need to be “better” or “do more.” While it may push us to achieve, over time it can become overwhelming, leaving us exhausted and disconnected from our true selves.
When we’re constantly in critic mode, we may notice:
Increased anxiety or worry about performance
Feeling “never good enough”
Avoiding new challenges for fear of failure
Difficulty acknowledging successes
The Power of Self-Compassion
Self-compassion isn’t about ignoring mistakes or letting yourself off the hook. Instead, it’s a practice of treating yourself with the same kindness and understanding you would offer a close friend.
Research shows that people who practice self-compassion:
Are more resilient in the face of challenges
Experience lower levels of stress and anxiety
Have healthier relationships with themselves and others
Simple Practices to Strengthen Self-Compassion
Here are a few ways to start cultivating a kinder inner voice:
Name Your Critic – Recognising when your inner critic is speaking is the first step toward responding differently.
Reframe Self-Talk – Replace “I failed” with “I’m learning, and it’s okay to make mistakes.”
Pause and Breathe – Take a moment to ground yourself when negative thoughts arise.
Connect with Nature – Gentle walks in the outdoors can help calm your nervous system and give your mind space to soften.
Reflect on Strengths – Keep a journal of small achievements or moments of courage to counterbalance the critical voice.
Why Nature-Based Therapy Helps
At Coastal Counselling, I use walk and talk therapy to help clients step away from the pressures of daily life and reconnect with themselves. Walking side-by-side rather than sitting face-to-face can make it easier to open up and process emotions. The natural environment acts as a gentle reminder of growth, patience, and resilience.
By combining movement, mindfulness, and guided conversation, clients learn to:
Tune into their supportive inner voice
Respond to themselves with understanding instead of judgment
Build lasting tools for emotional balance and self-acceptance
Final Thoughts
Self-compassion is a journey, not a quick fix. It takes practice, patience, and a willingness to notice when your inner critic is talking. By learning to respond with kindness instead of judgment, you can create space for growth, resilience, and emotional well-being.
If you’re ready to explore self-compassion in a safe, supportive environment — whether through nature-based sessions or personalised therapy — Coastal Counselling Walk and Talk Therapy is here to walk beside you.
Let’s take the first step together.